With Valentine's Day just around the corner are you wondering what to get you other half this year?

Research shows that many are tired of receiving the token flowers and chocolates.  So how do you impress your Valentine this year?  If you two have been together for a while and live together there are many things you can do to score extra brownie points this year.


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​(Image by Bing N. from Pixabay)

​It can be difficult to surprise them with something different if you have been together for several years.

I have put together a list of unique ways to show her you love and appreciate her this Valentines Day.

If you live together you may not have noticed all the jobs that they do around the house.  What kind of things do they always do that you never do? What things do they always do that you take for granted?  Is there a job that you avoid because you hate it and leave it for them to do? Start looking around you, what gesture could you make or what could you do to make them feel really appreciated.  I guarantee that if you use your imagination and do something they aren't expecting this year they will be impressed.  Seriously impressed.

Sometimes the simplest of things are the ones they will truly appreciate.

Here is a list of  some ideas:

Breakfast in bed at the weekend

Looking after the kids at the weekend so they can sleep in

Make dinner for the weekend and do all the cleaning up afterwards

Set up an indoor picnic for them complete with candles and rose petals

Make cute post it notes telling them what you love about them and stick them on the bathroom mirror

Put post it notes with cute messages all around the house for them to randomly find 

Take them somewhere nice with a picnic and what the sunset together

Set up a cosy place with blankets, candles and snacks and binge watch your favorite shows together

Make a Date night jar, write down all the romantic things you would like to do together and put those ideas into a pretty jar

Print out some love coupons that they can trade with you

Have a phone free date night, where you do't go on you phone

Make your own DIY basket full of their favorite chocolate and treats

Take them somewhere new and fun, like a trip to the local ice skating rink where you can have a lot of fun and laughs together

Make some homemade valentine cookies for them


The key to a successful Valentines day is to remember that money spent has nothing to do with the value they see, if they know that you have planned and organized to something special for them they will appreciate it so much more.

Have you noticed these days that we are bombarded by advertising about what our "perfect life" should look like?

You see a holiday advertised, kids playing happily in the sea, Dad whirling Mom around on the sand, with their perfect bodies, hair and make up.  Did your last vacation look like this??  I thought not!  Life can be beautiful but it is never perfect like these commercials.

Sometimes life can be messy but perfect at the same time,  it's important to realize these moments in your life that are 'perfect' to you.

I have seen Moms that have picture perfect houses, which I can assure you I do not have!  My house always needs a severe tidy up prior to guest arriving but I wouldn't have it ay other way.

People are striving for those perfect magazine houses and taking it quite seriously!  

Recently I noticed a fellow Mom post pictures of her daughters sleepover and they were at a table painting.  One Mom commented about how the sight of that paint on her dining room table would give her a heart attack.  She told the Mom she was "brave' allowing them to paint at all.

This fills me with sadness as I have encountered many Moms who houses are picture perfect at all time and their kids know better than to touch anything!!  I feel sadness that the children feel on edge if they even spill a crumb which will be promptly swept up by an angry Mom complaining about always having to clean.

Our children are such a gift and their childhood can fly by and be over before we even realize it. We should be encouraging our kids to experiment at the kitchen table, draw, paint and invent at the kitchen table.  Kitchen tables are meant to be the heart of the house where all sort of debates and conversations happen.

I love how my kitchen table has signs of wear and tear on it.  The marks are memories of slime making afternoons, inventions, cooking and painting times.  The marks remind me they are not little long, reminding me to allow them to make a mess (within reason of course) and become responsible for cleaning it up.

Kids need to get messy.  They need to get dirty.  They need to learn what makes a spectacular mess which is difficult to clean up.  These are life lessons.

Perfection is not about having the perfectly pristine, spotless house with children who are immaculate at all times.  Life is not about having the perfect figure, hair, make up and clothes and the seemingly perfect marriage.  The more we portray these images on advertising, the more the general public will strive to reach those "perfect' goals.

Children are no longer allowed to get dirty, their "good clothes" they wear everyday.

Is it any wonder that people hide away their "less than perfect" feelings and find it difficult to speak about their "less than perfect" problems??

Life doesn't have to be "perfect" to be perfect.

Find your own definition of perfect being imperfectly you!!

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My World this last week has been turned upside down.  I have been watching the heartbreaking news about the separation of families illegally entering the US oblivious to the fact that an immigration issue was about to hit our family.

We were moved over from Scotland to Houston by my husbands company, who shall remain nameless for legal purposes and fear of retaliation against our family.  Prior to moving over here my husband had already worked two years on a L1 visa so that meant we had five years left.  We were told that this was a permanent move and that ultimately the company would apply for a green card when the time came.

Well that time came around in April 2017 when we only had one year left on our visa.  My husband began to ask what was going to happen.  The downturn in the oil industry had already hit and we had taken several hits with regards to money.  First came the withdrawal of the company car with 2 weeks notice.  Then came no pay rises for 5 years.  That was then followed by voluntary furlough, then mandatory furlough and lastly came the reduction in bonus from 18 % to just 3 %.  Money was getting tighter and tighter, we tried hard to save for emergencies but at times we were just keeping our head above water.

Everyone assumes that because your husband works in the oil and gas industry that you are rolling in cash and that you have nothing to worry about, but this is simply not the case.

I have heard many stories of oil and gas giants fleecing employees out of money and time off. They even made it clear that you were still expected to work even when on you mandatory furlough. When the downturn in the oil industry started make no mistake, it was the average working class that took the hit.  The companies started to lay people off left, right and centre, they froze salaries, made the remaining employees absorb the true cost and take on additional unrealistic workloads.  Then, to rub salt into the wounds they threatened employees by telling them they should consider themselves lucky to have a job and to be grateful.

Take the CEO of my husband's company, he received a massive million dollar pay increase and a huge increase on his multi million bonus.  The down turn has not affected his income, only those further down the chain who are already struggling with huge workloads, a rising cost of living and a paycheck that has barely increased since 2013.

So my husband, 2 kids and I are now faced which a life changing crisis.  The company my husband works for decided to start the green card process a whole year after my husband voiced concerns about having something in place for when his visa run out.  They start the green card process and work permit application with just a few weeks left on our visa.  In fact we were down to ten days left before we had to leave the US when the green card was accepted and given a number by immigration.

They had five years in which to apply for our green cards.  He found out that many others had been granted their green cards with years still left on their visas, yet our visa was set to expire eight weeks before they even instructed the lawyers to proceed.

What we didn't know until last week was that the visa was going to run out on the 3rd of July and they had only filed for a work permit in June.  This meant that we are now faced with a period where his work visa has expired and his work permit has not yet been granted.

I didn't worry too much at first as I assumed there was no way that the company would leave a family with no income, I mean that would be ridiculous, and I thought that in the US that would be illegal bearing in mind that his company are the whole reason we are here.  I THOUGHT WRONG.

The company advised my husband last week that he will be placed on UNPAID leave until his work permit comes through.  This could take anywhere from 3 to 6 months.  

Boom!  Just like that we are faced with having no income, no ability to work and STRANDED in the US.

He has not worked enough years to become eligible social security benefits, we have to pay our own medical insurance for this undefined period and somehow find a way to keep a roof over our heads.

We could not believe that this was legal, I mean it simply can't be legal, right?  How can you take someone and their family over to a foreign country and then just drop them on unpaid leave, with no medical insurance?

Apparently they have done nothing illegal!!  immoral yes but not illegal.  Shocked by the realization that they were not going to take care of us we consulted an attorney.  It was then that we were told they had done nothing illegal.  In fact he can not be paid a salary as that in itself would be illegal due to the lack of work permit and an expired visa.  The attorney also told us that it would be very difficult to prove that they were negligent in not applying for the work permit in a timely manner.  He said that a lawsuit would cost thousands of dollars before it even got to court and advised us it would be near to impossible to go up against such a large corporation who have the best of attorneys to fight on their behalf.

So we are facing the prospect of trying to survive on what little savings we have and praying that we can get through it.

Could the company have done more for us, to ensure that we didn't suffer the hardship and the undue stress of the while situation?  Yes they could have.  But instead they chose to let us tough it out.  No consideration or care given to whether we lose our home we worked so hard to buy.  

There are several things this global billion dollar company could have done to support our family to ensure that we were looked after.  After all it was their mess that got us here in the first place.  If they had only filed for the green card and work permit sooner then none of this would have happened.  We would not be facing this stress.

The company who brought us over here doesn't even care that a loyal employee who works hard and has successfully ran a multi million dollar revenue stream for over 12 years is now faced with a very real reality that we may really struggle financially.  They only care about laying people off, making bigger and bigger profits and keeping the shareholders happy.  They even made their employees sign non competes to prevent them from leaving for a better paid job with another company.

After all this is over, whether we are homeless and sick, they expect him to duly return to work with a hop, skip and a jump and give 110% to his job like nothing ever happened! They expect him to be grateful they applied for his green card and grateful he has a job.

I really don't know how we get through this.  I will pray every day that the work permit comes in before we fall behind with our house payments.   

America the land of the free....it's about time that you implement employee rights that have tighter regulations.  Other countries have.  You can't implement furlough for example in the UK.  You can't have non competes in the UK and you certainly could not take a family over to a foreign country and at a weeks notice cut their pay.  

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I don't know about you but I am getting so fed up of my newsfeed on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram getting cluttered up by nonsense!

​Every day there's post after post on "miracle cures" for weight loss to curing currently incurable diseases and illnesses!

​It makes me so mad seeing these all over social media, people who are desperate for a quick fix it will try it out and realize that it doesn't work but not only does that demoralize the individual it also makes their goal seem unachievable.

​Every time an individual tries one of these quick fixes it causes mental damage to the individuals confidence and has them believing that they are a hopeless case.

​There is all sorts of potions and lotions, life hacks and miracle cures circulating right now.  I even saw a drink that claims to reverse the years of damage to your lungs that smoking causes!! I mean come on!!!

​The concerning point is that although the majority of people know that this seemingly too good to be true, potions will not do the trick. (I hope!) It is a concern that they are still circulating social media.  Social media runs subjects that are trending and the algorithm puts ahead posts that are receiving a lot of attention.  So why are these post doing well.  Why are people even trying these things?

​It is important to remember that sometimes getting back to basics is the best way to find your way to happy and heathy.

​We are surrounded by constant reminders im the media on how we fall short of being beautiful and perfect.  Advertising preys on your insecurities points them out, then convinces you through an ad that THEIR product can solve your problem.  You then go out and buy the product....bang!! Job done by the advertising team.

​You really don't need any fancy equipment, expensive lotions and potions or complicated fitness regimes to succeed at bring happy and healthy.  In fact sometime simple things are easier to work into your daily routine and can have a positive effect on your bank balance too! :)

Here are some tips to keeping healthy and happy simple:


​If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is I'm sorry to say!


Keep your diet simple, the less processed the better.


Get regular exercise, exercise doesn't have to cost a penny, it can be simply completing your housework at a faster pace, walking your dogs or carrying in your shopping bags from the car all on your own.


If you find yourself tempted by a miracle cure. Put your phone down and walk away!


Read an inspiring story of someone who overcame similar obstacles to yourself though hard work and determination, this reminds you that it takes hard work and motivation to achieve our goals.


Never give up on yourself.  Many people fail to reach their health goals many times before succeeding you just don't hear about the failures, many people only speak about their success.


Stay organized, this will help you stay and feel more calm and in control of your life and your goals.


​Whatever your goals are remember anything is possible when you believe!! :)
  

Yes the unthinkable has happened again.  Another crazed gunman has decided to go into a school and kill innocent children.  The sad truth is that it WILL happen again.  Sad but true.  Every time it happens the whole nation is appalled, saddened and indignant that it should never happen again.  Social media shares their thoughts and prayers.  People watch, deeply saddened at the loss of children's lives then slowly, as the days go by the memories fade and people begin to forget about it until one day, it happens again......to more innocent children and so the cycle continues.  Heated conversations regarding gun laws and mental health peak and ebb with each mass shooting, everyone has their opinion but nothing ever changes!!

Regardless of your opinion about the root cause of these school shootings, they will continue because no-one knows how to stop them or prevent them from happening.

No-one knows how to fix it.  Everyone is deeply entrenched in their opinions and their right to bear arms that no-one knows how to prevent future shootings.  So when it happens people get angry and have the conversations.  People call for action but nothing ever happens.  Nothing. Ever. Happens. Nothing. Changes. 

If you take no action as a nation how can you expect to prevent this from happening again.  No-one wants to challenge the status quo.  People who stand up and shout about gun control are shouted down by people who are adamant that their right to bear arms does not cause these shootings, they claim it's the lack of mental health services.  People who perceive that the nation's gun culture causes these atrocities believe that it is all too easy to purchase a rifle irrelevant of your mental health.

I feel the both sides have valid points, however something needs to change or it will keep happening.

America is the only country who is having these repeated events.  No other country in the world has this problem.  Come on America wake up. Do something. Take action. Or watch it happen again and again to innocent people, innocent children.

Our children should not be going to school and having to even participate in armed intruder drills.  There should be NO RISK! End of story.  You need to wake up. Your children should have the right to go to school safely.

How many more children are going to die because you don't know how to fix it?

How many more parents are going to lose their children because you didn't do anything.

I don't know how we fix this. I wish I could fix this.  I wish I could wave a magic wand and stop all future attacks of mass shootings.  I wish it were that simple. 

Wake up America!!   Don't just have discussions, point fingers or say thoughts and prayers.  Unite together and work out a solution.  Make your schools safe again.  We have already lost too many innocent lives and there will be more if nothing is done.  

Every single one of those lives mattered.  The media may forget and move on to the next big story but, for the families affected their pain never goes away.  It becomes a life sentence.  It's something they remember every morning before they open their eyes. How their loved one is longer alive.  Taken away so suddenly.

Come on America we need change. 

 
It turns out a bad start to a bad day.  You are already in pain when you wake up and you wonder how you are going to get through another day!

Chronic pain affects millions of people everyday.  It grinds you down over time.  It erodes your soul and makes you more tired than you ever thought possible!

Many people don't realize that there are many things you can do to help bring your pain level down.

We underestimate the power of controlled breathing, declaring that we have tried it and it doesn't work but most of us just didn't stick with it long enough.

When I was struggling to finish my degree at university, I was diagnosed with ME and Fibromyalgia.  I went to a rheumatologist who examined me and told me he wanted to refer me for some breathing tests.

I came out of the clinic absolutely fuming with rage, thinking this specialist was just as hopeless as the previous one.

On the day of the tests I duly turned up and did everything I was instructed to do. I had to wear breathing apparatus that was hooked up to a computer and had to do a series of breathing exercises.  I also filled in a questionnaire about my current symptoms.  I filled in my current issues such as fatigue, muscle pain and weakness. Stomach pain and headaches.

One month later I returned to see my specialist who announced  that the test had shown up that I did indeed have breathing issues and referred me to a physiotherapist who could teach me how breath properly again.  He explained that due to my background (childhood trauma) and my chronic pain, my body had started to breath way faster than the average person.  This had affected my CO2 levels in my body and that in itself was causing a lot of my symptoms.

I still thought this specialist was way off the mark but attended the physiotherapy sessions anyway.  Anything was worth a try, I was in constant pain daily!

The physiotherapist explained that my tests had show that I had a resting breathing rate nearly double what it should be.  Slowly week after week with her help, I managed to retrain my body to slow my breathing down with controlled breathing exercises.

Amazingly after 8 weeks of exercises my resting breathing rate started to go down.  To my amazement I started to have less and less of the symptoms that I thought were connected to the ME and Fibromyalgia.

I had less headaches, less dizziness and a little more energy.

I have never forgot how I scoffed to myself about how hopeless that specialist was!!  He had suspected an underlying issue and been spot on!!

It is useful to be aware the affect that chronic pain has on the body and how it can affect your breathing, yet so many people like I was are so quick to scoff at the idea of breathing exercises to help with chronic pain!!

When you are having a bad day with pain it can be of huge benefit to do some simple breathing exercises to calm your breathing down.

When we are in chronic pain and it last over a long period of time, our breathing rate can increase and this in turn can alter the CO2 levels in the body, which in turn can exacerbate our symptoms.

It is amazing what the power of our breath can do when we take time to breath deeper and slower.

Never underestimate the power of your breathing pattern!

Here at Life With Help we help you get through life. 

​Making positive changes to your life can be tricky.  Life is always so busy that you start a new routine but find it hard to stay on track.

​I know so many people who are dealing with weight issues.  Each New Year they post on Facebook that "This will be the year I get fit and lose weight"  They then squeeze themselves into last years active wear which is even tighter than it was and determinedly head to the gym.

​They start off all guns blazing for the first week, committing fully to the 3 days a week hitting the gym.

​Then gradually the motivation decreases, family and work get in the way. They start to feel guilty. They tell themselves what a failure they are and give up......until next New Year where they repeat the cycle. And each year they are heavier and more unfit than the last year.

​Each time we set our minds to make a positive change in our lives and we fail, we are reinforcing to ourselves that change is simply too hard to implement.  In time we shrug our shoulders and say its not worth it.

If you want to make a positive change in your life go for it but plan things out and take SMALL manageable steps towards your goal.  The smaller the steps are the more achievable they are.  Smaller steps can often enable us to gradually reach our goals.  When your steps are small enough and you can achieve them, your motivation and determination to tackle the next step will be higher.

​A good way to start weight loss for example is to not start with hitting the gym in your Lycra active wear.  You can start by removing some of the naughty foods you eat. Making small changes to you diet first can help you start to lose some weight and give you more energy.

​What ever your goal.  Sit down and plan out small steps and a REALISTIC timeline for you to accomplish them.  You will be surprised at how much easier it is!

Dear Ceo,

I am aware of how much you earned last year and noticed you got a 12 % pay rise on your 20 million dollar pay check and that you earned a phenomenal bonus to top it off.  Congratulations.

In order to meet your objectives and orders from the share holders to cut back, I hope you are fully aware of how unfair it seems when some of your workers only got a 3% pay rise.  The first in four years I might add.  My hard working husband only got a 3% bonus. He is entitled to 20% but you make the objectives unrealistic just so you can pay out less. 

When we first got the opportunity to move to Houston with my Husband's work, I was a little hesitant.  It was a big move from the little village we were used to in Scotland.

Most of my doubts disappeared though when I saw the relocation package your company offered.  It sounded amazing and too good to be true.  I mean I was even going to be given full support throughout the move from the relocation company.

There was the promise of a meet and greet at the airport followed by a tour around the city.  We were promised help with finding a home, a school for the kids, career support for me and a relocation package.

We decided to go ahead.  I want you to know how hard it was.  In reality it was very different.  No-one showed up to the airport for a meet and greet.  We drove ourselves to the temporary accommodation we had arranged for and had paid for with our own credit card.  Apparently we had to pay all the costs upfront and your delightful company made things so much easier by continually questioning every payment we asked to be reimbursed for.

Five years on and your company has really excelled itself, by making sure that my husband has very little time off.  He now does his bosses job for less pay along with several other people's jobs.  

You took his company vehicle away with 2 weeks notice.  Then, to save even more money you made people take furlough.  They started off voluntary but it was made very clear that it was expected that you take them.  

To add insult to injury, my husband took his furlough's to comply with orders but ended up taking conference calls and sending emails.  Yes, effectively you had everyone WORKING on furlough.  Illegal and just plain wrong.  Every time he tries to book holidays an "emergency" happens and he is made to fly away to deal with it.  We have had to cancel holiday plans many times.

Your company makes it very clear that work comes first and family comes second.  I have watched time and time again, my husband being forced to put his work first and his family second.  It hurts so much to know he is forced to make this choice or he will be fired.

I wonder if you know that the cuts you make to meet targets set by the shareholders only feed down the chain and hurt the workers that make your company.  Instead of rewarding excellent work, you squeeze every last penny you can from these people like my husband.    

​Just to make your targets, you are firing people that are a necessary part of your machine.  My husband now runs a multi million revenue almost alone.  He is doing at least 6 other people's jobs.  I guess your company doesn't care about that though.

To make matters worse our family's visa runs out in a few months and nothing is being down about it, no-one is planning our future.  We are in a state of limbo.  We deserve to know by now whether we are staying or going.  You have no right to treat us like we don't matter.  We are not robots.  

By the way I am still waiting for my career support you promised me in the contract for relocation.  No-one from your company has every contacted me or supported our family in any way.  Thanks!

I wonder if you are happy with all the money you are making and if you are aware of how much your decisions affect my family.  I wonder if you give your job the same level of commitment my husband gives your company every day.

I really would like to know if you think it's fair that you get all these pay rises and bonuses,  yet you don't order the same percentage increases for all your workers?  

​Do you think you are motivating them to do their best for the company?  Do you think they would stay with you if they had a choice? Oh, that's right you made them sign a non-compete to make it even harder for them to leave even when they have had enough.  Nice. 

Your competitors don't treat people as badly as you.  Your company has built itself a reputation for not allowing a good work- home balance but I don't suppose you care.  You will be too busy looking at your big bank balance, driving your fancy car and living in your swanky house.  I hope one day you actually care!! 

Years ago corporations worked hard to keep employees and treated them fairly.  Ceo's didn't earn millions of dollars more than their workers.  People working for the corporation were rewarded for their hard work.  They were given family time and corporation understood the need for family time.

Anyone else got stories from working in a corporation?  I would love to hear them. :)

You only have to turn on the news nowadays to hear about all the negative things going on in the world today.  More often than not it is only the bad stuff you hear about. If you are a sensitive person then turning on the news each day will not do your personal physical and mental well being any good.


When we are more sensitive to the suffering of the world and find ourselves tearing up and the devastating events that the news covers it can be difficult to stop that empathic feelings from affecting you, even ruling your moods.


Some of us are more empathic than others and that's ok.  We are all different.  We all handle the news in different ways.  For some it can trigger extreme emotions which start to impact the individual.


Take a sad movie for example, for some they can watch the film and not actually be emotionally affected by the film but some of us it is a completely different experience.  For some people they become emotionally involved in the film where they actually  immerse themselves fully in the film, so they are actually feeling the emotions of the actors as if they were actually living the story line.  For these kind of empathic souls, the news itself can become an emotional rollercoaster that leaves them feeling emotionally exhausted, unable to stop thinking about the images they saw that day.


At the moment there have been so many stories of lives lost to hurricanes, flooding, earthquakes and terror attacks that I'm almost afraid to put the news on.


I am one of these people who actually empathize a little too much with what I see on the news.  it can leave me feeling drained, upset and despondant about the current state of the world today.  I can find it difficult to shake the feelings off long after I have turned off the news.


For someone who is very Empathic or who is a Highly Sensitive Person, the news can be simply too much.
​

I for one am not proud of the state of the world right now.  We as a collective are letting ourselves down.  We mistreat animals, put pigs in cages where they cannot move until they are ready to be slaughtered, dump dogs, puppies, cats and kittens that are an inconvenience. Animals WE domesticated and took away their ability to survive in the wild.


There are wars raging that we hear nothing about, where hundreds of innocent children die.  There  are children that die from dehydration and hunger every day in Third World countries.  


Corporations are getting richer and richer and have less and less compassion for their workers who make that happen.  Instead of being rewarded they are made to work with very little time off allowed so they can spend time with their families.  Corporations are acting like they own the souls of these people and that their families comes second to their profits.


Sexual, domestic and childhood abuse has been found to be swept under the carpet and hushed up by people who have their own agendas for staying silent.  It's the minority that are brave enough to step up and speak up.
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Mental health issues are hushed up, people are encouraged not to discuss the pain they are suffering.  Then when a mass shooting occurs like the one we had in Florida, it comes out that so many chose to turn the other way and ignore the warning signs.  Scared to speak up and be the one to rock the boat.


We are chopping down our rainforests, there is climate change issues, pollution issues, government corruption issues.....am I proud to be human right now?  No I am not!!  For someone who feel deeply and cares deeply I am disappointed and horrified at the state we humans and our planet are in right now.


Every life on this earth should matter.  Every life should matter more than money or guns or power.  How can we change this?   How can we turn this around?  Because if we all sit there in our comfortable houses and switch off the news and choose to look the other way what will change.......nothing.  Nothing will change.


How do we make a difference in the world?  How do we become more accountable fo the state of the world today?  I for one want to be proud of the world I live in.  I want there to be peace.  I want every child to have access to basic medication, food, water and a roof over their heads.


I want us to stop polluting our oceans.  I want the greedy corporations to start treating their employees like they are trash, putting their profits second to their families.

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I want us to be responsible and accountable.  I WANT CHANGE! :)

What are your goals for 2018? Do you want to lose weight? Want to start your own business? Change your job? Get fit?


Whatever your goals for 2018, it can be hard to commit to them.  Often we give others our 100% commitment yet, when it comes to ourselves we often fall short of giving ourselves the full commitment.  Why?


There can be many reasons why we don't give ourselves our full commitment to reaching goals.  Fear, time constraints, Lack of motivation and putting others before ourselves are all pulling on us, making our goals difficult to reach.

We can find it difficult to commit to ourselves, especially if we view ourselves negatively, that little voice in our heads telling ourselves that we are not worth the time or that we will fail again so why even try.

Other commitments often take precedence over our personal goals.  We have to commit to working so we have money.  We have to give our families commitment, especially our children and partners.  It's so easy to fall short of giving our personal goals the commitment they need to see them come to fruition.

So how do we commit fully to our personal goals?

I have put together some tips to keep you on track and help you succeed in hitting those goals in 2018.

1.     Make a list of personal goals you want to achieve in 2018


2.     Carve out time in your schedule to work on those goals.


3.     Break each goal down into smaller goals so you can celebrate the small successes            which will boost your motivation and determination to tackle the next step.


4.    Each month check in with your list and check that you are still working towards your goals.


5,     If you fall off the wagon, don't beat yourself up.  Everyone does from time to time.  Take a breath and get yourself back on track with no judgement.


6.     Keep your goals personal.  Research has shown that when you share your goals with others, you have less chance of succeeding.  No-one needs to know what you are trying to do until you succeed, then, they can celebrate with you.


7.     Practice mindfulness.  You will never reach any of your goals if you are constantly telling yourself how you fall short.  Keep your self talk positive and encouraging.  You should be supporting yourself not spotlighting all your flaws.


8.     Practice visualizing you reaching those goals and what it would actually mean and feel to attain them.  Feel those positive emotions, take them all in and use those emotions to fuel your determination and motivation.


It can be difficult to put yourself on the priority list if you are accustomed to putting everyone else before you. But, you deserve to spend time on yourself.  It's not selfish.  By spending time on yourself and practicing good self care, those around you will also benefit. 


I recommend that you allocate time each week to work towards your goals.  When you schedule the time in, you are more likely to do it.  Establishing the habit of working towards your goals, gives you more chance of succeeding than just trying to fit the work in here and there.


Remember to give yourself 100% commitment.  Fear can prevent us from doing that.  Sometimes we are actually scared to see our goals through.  We can subconsciously sabotage our efforts to succeed because deep down we don't think we deserve to succeed or we are afraid of how succeeding would actually change our lives.

Good luck and don't forget to let me know what you think of this article!  I love to hear from my readers! :)